MOPS · motherhood · perfectly imperfect

My Done List

A couple of weeks ago I was thrown in a church van and carted off to Nashville and suckered into being on the leadership team for my local MOPS group.  Really, that’s how it happened.

Or rather, my good friend ML knew exactly which of my gifts to appeal to when she asked me to consider taking a last minute opening on the Steering Team, and then she dangled the notion of FOUR DAYS in a fancy hotel in a faraway city WITHOUT my kids.

So, we all know I said yes.  And I learned a lot in those four days about myself, about my friends, about my mothering. Some of it I’m going to be sharing over the next few weeks as I begin to make peace with myself about who I am and who I want to be.  Some of it I’m saving for when I get my new blog up and running.

That’s right.  In a few weeks, Random Acts is going private and I’m going to try something new about this new life I’ve been given.  So, anyway, all that is to say that the speaker of my session on relieving our mommy stress suggested the very simple task of NOT creating to-do lists.

I don’t know about you, but I love lists.  The satisfaction of crossing something off is cheaper than a therapist and less caloric than a mocha frappe.  But she was right.  If I don’t cross everything off, I feel like a failure.  Hello, perfectionist pleaser in me that needs to be eradicated.  Or at least toned down.  Instead, she suggested that if we mothers need a list full of check marks to feel successful, why not create a list of that day’s accomplishments.  So simple.  So exactly what I need to remember some days.  So now you’ve read all my rambling so you can get to a list of why exactly I have been blog absent and blessedly busy the past week.

I’ve done….
packed suitcases and backpacks and picnics for family vacation
and this time I remembered the pack and play.
trekked my girls all over downtown Asheville and indulged them in cupcakes and suckers and paint your own pottery.
cried at the news story of Joplin, Missouri who despite the obstacles opened their schools on time for the 2011-2012 school year so that those students could experience normalcy.  And they took in every student no matter where they’ve been displaced to, because when you’ve lost your home or your parents or your routine, the last thing kids need is teachers who don’t remember their names.
learned to work the GPS on Joshua’s new Droid phone so we can join the 21st century.
taken over 200 pictures that no one but me probably cares to see but they make me smile.
cautioned the girls not to squeeze the baby chickens.
resisted the urge to refold all the dishtowels Belle folded for me.
fielded dozens of phone calls about our elementary school situation.
opted NOT to talk to the media about it.
thought about a dozen blog ideas.
picked a dozen roma tomatoes.  We actually grew something!
cleaned the bathroom within 30 minutes of arriving home because the toilet overflowed.
cleaned the house in anticipation of a showing that didn’t show.  
attended two MOPS steering team meetings and heading back tonight.
missed an important rehearsal but learned my lines for the first four pages.
visited my friends at North and confessed to myself that I miss those Bobcats.
I’ll stop now because that’s enough.  But isn’t it sad that we beat ourselves up over feeling like we’ve done nothing all day when in reality we’ve done so much to make the world a better place for us and for those little ones whose eyes are already on us?

3 thoughts on “My Done List

  1. Girl, you are speaking directly to me, right? It sure feels like it! I am SO bad at putting myself down, feeling like I haven't done anything, like I'm a failure…it's awful, and it drives my husband crazy. Gosh, I needed to read this. SO BAD. Thank you tons!!


  2. i was about to make a list of the stuff i want to get done when preschool starts next week, and i have both boys out of the house for a few hours…but maybe i'll just list my accomplishments:

    why just today:
    i've updated the blog
    read AND commented on two different friends' blogs
    ordered new jeans for Jack from Old Navy online – big denim sale this week
    designed a church advertisement
    talked to my new CBS core leader
    laundry…washed, folded and washed more (glad i didn't make a list b/c surely putting it away would have been on there!)
    oh, and lamented the fact that i now have an 18 month old!!


  3. i LOVE your perspective. thank you for reminding all of us that what we are doing… every minute of every day is way way more important than those ridiculous things always on our to do lists. thanks for linking up!


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