There are piles of unfolded laundry in my living room and unwashed dishes in the sink. The floor needs sweeping again and one of these days I’m going to put all the junk in my room in the storage shed. I’m exhausted, the kids are tired and cranky by this time of day, but daddy just came home.
Did I mention it’s VBS week?
That’s what I’m thankful for. That despite the fatigue that comes with a full week of fun and games, Annabelle is talking more than she ever has about Jesus. Madelynne has started saying “yes m’am” unprompted and her teachers keep telling me how smart she is. Amelia and Gus? They’re being taken care of by a swarm of tireless nursery workers who are the unsung heroes of God’s Amazing Wonders.
So that’s where we’ve been this week. Too busy to take pictures and too tired to post the ones still on the camera.
But it’s worth it for them to discover that church can be fun and God can do amazing things if we open our eyes to see.
Today is my 300th post. I always knew I had that many words (and so many more) but I never dreamed anyone (except my mom) would care.
Thank you for reading here, commenting here, coming here and reminding me I’m not alone in this journey of motherhood and self and salvation.
Last night we gathered in a living room and perched on couch arms and kitchen stools and drank wine out of tea glasses and sipped coffee from porcelain mugs and talked and laughed and learned.
At least I did.
Me, the one who always compares, who always finds some reason why I don’t measure up, who is certain that no one would really care to really know me, the mom who would rather write about life than live it.
But if I’m not really opening myself up to the challenge of living, what’s left to write?
I’ve discovered when you open yourself up and listen to the said and unsaid, it can be amazing what you hear.
No one has it together.
For some of us, we collapse under the weight of the unexpected, for others it’s the weight of expected perfection, the challenge of always putting forth the face we think others want to see.
Sometimes we just need to hear that we’re not alone. We’re not crazy.
We’re covered in grace, that belief that though I deserve nothing, I have everything.
And my everything doesn’t have to look like everyone else’s.
one.
Madelynne all curled up in our armchair reading chapter books all by herself ignoring the chaos around her until her baby sis climbs up too.
two.
The noisy baby napping nearby who grunts and sighs and purrs non-stop when I am trying to nap but who curls into my chest and is quiet as can be.
three.
When Amelia wakes up her hair is everywhere all swirls and curls and sweetness.
four.
Just one day when we all got along (mostly) and I reinstated some confidence in myself.
five.
Handfuls of not-quite-ripe blackberries they and their favorite boy friends are picking off the bushes.
six.
Dishwasher humming, dryer thumping, crockpot bubbling, babies all at rest.
and big girls at art camp 🙂
seven.
Long nursing sessions when we’re just both so content.
eight.
Eight little feet that will bring the Good News
we pray.
nine.
Clutching her “star bucks” Annabelle says, “Mommy, did you know the library has a room where you can buy stuff?” The library is our new favorite summer place.
ten.
Trying for a perfect moment sometimes gets you one better.
It may not have been the original vision, but it’s ours.
Linking up today over at Growing Home and Many Little Blessings.
and all photographs are courtesy of MBShaw Photography.
Today we had just what we needed. Just one day. One day where nothing worked out according to plan, but everything just worked out. One day where the fussing and the fighting and the freak outs were a under control.
Or at least not driving me too crazy.
The worst part was when Annabelle threw up in the parking lot of state park shelter #6 after I had driven us around for forty-five minutes in search of a waterfall hike with directions that were fifteen years old and thus, incorrect.
She get carsick, no big deal.
So we had our picnic by the creek and I nursed Gus and they played on the playground and swam their cheddar cheese goldfish cracker knockoffs around the picnic table. Why is eating outside always more fun?
I think it’s because mommy isn’t saying sit down or don’t swim your crackers around the table!
Then we did a really brave thing mostly motivated by my desire to exhaust them all for an early bedtime since daddy is working late and my need to move this baby pudge.
My baby pudge, not Gus’s. His is adorable.
We hiked halfway around the lake to the Visitor’s Center for a wildlife program.
Have you ever trekked a mile in the woods with a two year old?
It’s the reason child leashes were invented.
I was sure at any moment she was tumbling down the steep bank into the water. She was sure every moment was for picking up sticks, eating pebbles, and climbing barrier fences.
She had a blast. Her big sisters were appeased by the bigger playground at the end and ice cream.
When we finally made it back to the shelter, I did a crazy thing. I let them take off their shoes and wade in the creek while I nursed again. And I didn’t even yell when Amelia got her shorts all wet and Madelynne used all the rest of the wipes to clean her feet before she put her shoes back on.
Then we piled in the minivan and took the backroads home. They all fell asleep and for just a moment, there was complete contentment and peace.
Linking up with Julia and others for Thankful Thursday.
